Some Truth

The days
keep running
into each other
and I am all but lost
in the indecision.
I kid myself
into thinking
that we would be
if only I were free,
but that’s not quite true, is it?
You are there living a life
absent of me
and I am here swimming upstream
in hopes of coming out alive
even though I can see
my bruise-riddled body
struggling for breath.
What’s truth is
I don’t know you anymore
even though you look the same
and sound the same
and think the same.
Your experiences have changed you, morphed you into someone
I do not recognize.
Except I do.
I see the old you
in these new visages
that stand where you used to.
And the truth is that
I am not the same.
I am strong yet weak,
lucid yet chaotic.
I know who I am
but not who I am becoming.
Is this how we all feel
when we realize what it means
to grow up?
Is this why we tell teenagers
that their ideas of love
are romantic notions
to be dismissed
for more sturdy
and reliable versions
of passion?
I know we are not the same as before, that our faces have
aged and wrinkled
under the hands of time.
Yet I know that our fingers
still fit together
with awkward perfection
and our hearts burn
with the unbidden passion
of youth.
I know that it is but miles
that truly part us
and that you hold my heart
just as I carry yours.

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