Photo Credit: after-the-party at deviantart.com

I’m the queen
of drafting
and forgetting.
I write letters
and odes,
and then watch them
wither and die
in the dusty blog archives
and flash drive wastelands.
They wait for inspiration,
for remembering,
for something more
than they are.
They never find satisfaction,
and, yet,
they stay,
sheltered in shadow
and hovering just below excellence,
so I don’t delete them.

I never delete.

Not emails
or sappy poems
or old essays.
I have boxes
of old words
caked with yesterday’s dust.
And I never delete friends
because one day
they might need me
and you know I never say no.
I can’t bear it
if I leave without reason
or at least a goodbye.

I guess that’s where we differ.
You hold onto old paper
and ignore flesh and blood,
deleting with impunity,
while I hold so tightly
to words,
to the people
who hold them,
that I never let go.
I squeeze until I bleed words
that look more like balloons
instead of shackles.

I bleed and you release.


I was thinking today how I typically post daily or close to that except during times of extreme stress and responsibility. This is one of those times, so I got to wondering if you notice, if you are disappointed, if you’re indifferent which is the reason for this note–to explain or apologize or both. You see, I am a high school teacher and in charge of oh so many things. So please forgive my absence. πŸ™‚




15 thoughts on “Drafting

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