The Leaving

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Photo Credit: embracemoi at deviantart.com

Twisted knots,
fluttering sick,
these bitches won’t stop
jumping on my guts.

It’s the leaving.
It’s why I’m so caught up.

The waving eyes
and watery stares
that say goodbye
so soon after hello.
I’ve been left so much,
I don’t appreciate
the stays,
the I’m heres,
the forevers
that get tossed my way.
I slam those doors
and windows
and beg for the ones who’ve left
because I want to be good enough
for forever.

That’s how parents
are supposed to be,
but that’s bullshit in my case,
and pieces of me
keep getting left behind
by me,
by them,
by anyone that ever really
proclaimed to give a fuck.

So it’s the leaving
that’s screwed me
beyond repair,
beyond anything
that resembles a whole person.
I’m pieces,
shards of a human
who used to be real,
and now my stomach is filled
with angry butterflies
and my eyes full of salt.

And it’s the leaving
and the not letting go
that’s done it so…
yeah…
it’s my own fault.

I think I need therapy.

~Patience

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4 thoughts on “The Leaving

  1. I’ve often wondered the same, Patience… why I worry so much over those who’ve left and ignore the ones who are still here… gotta be something twisted about that… and that’s coming from someone who’s had way too much therapy and still can’t get over it.

    Liked by 1 person

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