Photo Credit: utopic-man at deviantart.com

I think
I’m over the absence
infiltrating my days.

It’s almost unbearable,
the constant wondering
when you aren’t wondering
at all.

It’s so fucking stupid.

I want to throw things
at the wall,
at your head,
and I’m getting pissed off.

I am pissed off
and I don’t really have
a right or a reason to be.
I just am.

I used to think
your constant attention
was intolerable,
but now I see
the quiet is worse.

I wish you’d never come back.

I wish I’d never answered
that message.

Then my brain
wouldn’t be trying
to juggle yet another ball.

I’d be quietly drowning
instead of splashing around
in the deep end
while crowds of people
devour my demise.

~ Patience


6 thoughts on “Juggling

  1. Sounds like you’re slowly, getting away, becoming psychologically codependent no longer from your relationships, and, i just want to tell you, that you’re on the right track, and it’s never easy, to take back the trust or the love you’d placed in someone, but sometimes, it’s a necessity that this gets done, in order for you to be fully free mentally and psychologically, so, keep working at it!!!

    Liked by 1 person

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