Stuck

Stasis.
This frozen space
where I can’t move forward
but I know I can’t stay here.

Every day
for fifteen years.

Suspended,

I hang above my body
watching,
waiting
for the moment of escape,
the moment I’ll know
it’s time to take back over,
to get on that bus again,

and go.

Where?
Who knows?
But one day
the amber will break
and I’ll finally be free.

I’ll take control
again
or maybe finally,
and I’ll find my happy.

Those glimpses of cloudy memories
where the smiles were real
and the joy true.

But for now,
I’m still stuck
in this self-made shell,
this stasis,
and all I want is out.

~Patience

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