Existing

The stars keep blinking out, shuddering and shuttering in their wounded worlds, wrapping unseen landscapes in black, shimmering once and exploding into a nothing so vast it exists only in not existing. Each breath folds against the next and small pieces fracture into atoms, particles of sadness and blackness and it runs into floors, full […]

Bad Choices Meet Anxiety

It’s pulling me, dragging me, yanking my skin from my bones in tiny tremors, and I can’t stop doing things to make it worse. Each step ignites even more aching shudders, ones that drive spikes into my eyes until I scream out, knowing that each bite is my own, each sour drop of pain began […]

It Never Stops

Buzzing, a hammering in my brain but deeper. Shaking, twisting around my insides, and I just need it to stop. I scream for it to stop. “You did nothing wrong!” “Everything’s fine!” But it screams right back in my face and I somehow know it’s right. I’m waiting for the basket to get too full, […]

Judgement: A Conversation in My Head 

“Why do you care what people will think?” “I can’t help it. It’s who I am.” “Explain.” “Explain what?” “How is it who you are?” “I’m anxious, worried. Always. Since I was little. I worry what people think, if I’m good enough, if people like me. I can’t stop it. No matter how hard I […]