The First

Suddenly, old is new again, and I’m not sure how it happened. Like fate or kismet or some kind of coincidence that can’t be coincidental. I remember his strong hands, the arms that held me up, that pushed me down and made me feel alive when I seemed underwater, when I seemed lost in trying […]


What am I supposed to do? It’s fucked. The whole thing. You want black and white, and give me only gray, yet I’m to choose. This or that. All or nothing. And I want all, but fear bites at my heels and you provide zero comfort. Your idea of reassurance is silence, and anxiety suffocates […]

Beer and Movies

The damp southern air slid over her skin creating a slick layer of ocean mixed with sweat on her arms. She looked out the car window for the distant breeze rustling the palms across the way and wondered at the idea that she was finally there or here, if she wanted to get technical. The […]

Lunch Date: A Conversation in My Head 

“I was thinking about something you said.” “Oh, yeah?” “Yeah. You asked if we’d ever been just friends, and I’ve been thinking about that.” “And what have you concluded?” “I think we’ve always been whatever this is. I mean, when I first met you, I was attracted to you. I remember that.” “So do I.” […]

Empty Carts, Revisited

​It wouldn’t have worked out anyway. I tell myself these lies in hopes that my heart will eventually believe them, will eventually quell the pain that slowly circumnavigates my body and drives tiny splinters of missing underneath my chewed fingernails. I cannot breathe without breathing you. I cannot drink without every sip tasting of your […]

Happy Birthday 

I often wonder what you remember, which moments you relive when you think of us, which stills stayed all this time. Today, I remembered the last day. The drive near the ocean, windows down, my arm pressing back against the wind while guitar music floated out of the speakers. It was that one song, the […]

The Shedding of Pieces 

The things we leave behind are also the things we carry. We slough off the people and places we outgrow, shake free from stale ideas and antique dreams, yet these fragments we try to lose are the scaffolding on which we live, grow, love, die. Without the shedding of pieces, we would not be ourselves, […]