I Am Made of Letters

Dear Johnny, I can’t talk about you without crying. I once heard that you will know you’re over something when you can talk about it without crying. It’s been fifteen years since I’ve seen your face, touched your skin, felt your breath on my neck, your lips wandering down my spine. And I still cry. […]

Human: A Journal Entry 

To those who listen: It’s not the same anymore. I’m not excited in all the ways that matter. I’ve tried to be, to find ways to make me want to, to make me interested, but it’s like before. My body rejects people. Physically rejects them. When the heat is gone, the thing, whatever it might […]

Crowds: A Journal Entry 

To those who listen: This quote–it really gets me, like in all my sore places. Like each word drives another blade into my heart. Because I completely understand looking for someone who will never be there. I sat there, reading those lines again and again, and fat tears rolled down my face, those involuntary kinds […]

Someone Else: A Journal Entry

To those who listen: I can’t stop thinking about Johnny which is nothing new, but I keep wondering if I’d actually go, if I’d be better there, or if I’d still feel this listless wanting biting into my skin as each day pecks by, minutes on clocks forever rounding into the next mundane moment. Would […]

Therapy: A Journal Entry

To those who listen: Today, I thought about writing a journal entry instead of a poem, but it’s different to write my thoughts without their metaphor blankets, to see my words bare and raw in their truth instead of swirled between symbols and line breaks, pauses and similes that hide what I’m really trying to […]

Unspool

With the confusion comes the insatiable desire for more, to feel you between and inside, to wrap you up and unspool you, watch your wires unfurl from the touch of my fingers while I wilt at a brush of yours. Yet, I’ve wandered into a dark place where doubt rains down in fat chips that […]

Like Fiction

I built you from snapshots and movie stills, and I watched you turn into fiction, your bones becoming paper stained with tears and words you’ll never read. You were a novel crafted til you reached perfection, that pedestal of hope that never really existed outside these fantasy pages. I turned us into poetry, into stanzas […]

Words Aren’t Enough 

My words aren’t good enough, right enough to explain how missing you fills my body, swims in my blood, eats through my skin until I’m nothing but a pile of empty. No words can depict how the lack of you burns me into heaps of embers choking on loss. Nothing I say can show you […]